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The Infertile Woman’s New Year’s Resolution

By Tracey Minella

January 1st, 2013 at 12:36 pm

credit; Simon Howden/

1. Have a Baby in 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013.

That’s it. Same old resolution. Can you even remember when it wasn’t the resolution?

I don’t know what’s more frustrating: Making the same resolution of having a baby or listening to others making their insignificant resolutions to lose the last 5 pounds of their baby weight. Could anything be more important than having a baby?

The frustration about listening to the resolutions of others…many of which are destined to fail due to a lack of real commitment… is that in most cases the resolutions could succeed if the maker wanted it badly enough. The powers to lose weight, quit smoking, or make more money… while not easy… are more often than not within the control of the person who says they want it.

For women who are infertile and unable to conceive without medical intervention, having a baby is not in their ultimate control. Sure they can get in good shape, eat well, take vitamins, and even update their dental health to maximize their chances. Then, if they can afford it, they can find a great Reproductive Endocrinologist, follow the prescribed protocol and… hope to get pregnant.

They can only hope.

Getting pregnant is not in their hands. It’s not a choice they can just make. The lack of control over the situation is maddening. And it’s even harder for those who need IVF and can’t afford it. It makes the goal flat out unattainable… unless a creative, alternative financing solution is found.

Yet we still make that same resolution because the hope of it coming true is what gets us out of bed each morning. So what can we do differently in 2013?

Perhaps we can start with a better mindset. And by that, I don’t mean forcing some bubbly optimism about the New Year if you’re not feeling it. I mean being realistic and balanced about it all. I mean taking the famous quote to heart about having the serenity to accept what you can’t change, the courage to change what you can, and the wisdom to know the difference. To calm the chaos a bit.

This month, the blog will feature posts that will help you focus on the balance of the above quote. To help you realize and accept what you can’t change, while giving you the courage to change the things you can. Real steps to help you release the negative and move you forward on the road to fulfilling that New Year’s resolution of having a baby. Empowering stuff.

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Do you have a specific plan to fulfill your New Year’s resolution this year?

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